Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
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