Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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