Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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