yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
