ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
