Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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