..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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