it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
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