I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Randomize
