u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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