apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
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