we made out on top of his cat.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Randomize
