I'm lost and stupid without you.
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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