I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
