Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
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Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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