oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with