she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear