Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
its liver damage thursday
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
