she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
You need Xanax blowdarts
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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