Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
