You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
pop tarts are not kleenex
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
