It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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