yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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