ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
