Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
