i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Randomize
