Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize