Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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