How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
this beer tastes like vomit already
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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