May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
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