Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
