then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
