have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
He told me they were just razor bumps!
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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