a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize