is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
