Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Randomize
