susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
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all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
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You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
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