kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize