Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They took my balls.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
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