"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Randomize