Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Barsexuality is the new black.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize