So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
