the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
