i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
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