and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Randomize