well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
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When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
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I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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