he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
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