I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize
