I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
