R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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