Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize