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• (815): View more from Illinois

  I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.

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• (907): View more from Alaska

  I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself

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• (917): View more from New York City

  im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out

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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.

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• 

  Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (785): View more from Kansas

  So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.

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• (502): View more from Kentucky

  If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.

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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost

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• (228): View more from Mississippi

  I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot

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• (406): View more from Montana

  He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (203): View more from Connecticut

  wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something

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• (231): View more from Michigan

  Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover

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• (612): View more from Minnesota

  I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.

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• (802): View more from Vermont

  Omg that was my second thought of the morning.

  (802): View more from Vermont

  First was that we had pop tarts.

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• (647): View more from Ontario

  I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back

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• (360): View more from Washington

  Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.

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