how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
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